Today I had a 2:45 dentist appointment, as I do every six months. Now, I love, love, LOVE brushing and flossing my teeth. I honestly do However, I did not get a chance to brush the mac ‘n’ cheese off my teeth before I looked at the clock and saw that it was 2:01. In a panic, I left for the appointment and arrived at 2:33. Not too shabby. My sister and mother were in the waiting room already. They had been sitting there for quite some time when, ironically I was called in almost as soon as I got there. I trudged my way to the first room on the left, following the footsteps of the dental hygienist. She’s definitely top 10 dorkiest humans ever.
I somehow discovered she was about 26 or so and married to a man she went to college with I hope, for her sake, that means she has sex. That would put hope into the world. Don’t get me wrong, she’s very friendly and nice, just an extremely dorky person. Among these details came a whole army of other pointless stories about friends and acquaintances of hers. Before I even sat down, I told her how I hadn’t had time to brush before I came. She handed me a purple toothbrush, Crest 3D whitening toothpaste, and a little pink cup to spit my toothpaste in.
Quite the fancy stuff. After the excitement of brushing my teeth in a new and highly appropriate place, I got in the chair and she began to work on my teeth. She began with commenting on my awesome teeth, as she always does, and started picking the hell out of them. As we went through the exact conversation we had my last appointment, I realized just how much I truly don’t like people. They’ve become so impersonal and yet want to control everyone and everything around them. Somewhere in there I threw in the fact that I hate people and she found that pretty damn funny. I don’t understand the hilarity of someone disliking their own species.
I suppose she thought it was silly, being that she confessed her fondness for people. Odd girl. Eventually, the actual dentist came in to do his job of poking around my mouth. He discovered a cavity he had filled the previous year had decayed again. It had been one of seven cavities I acquired, all at the same time. It dawned on him he had already done it before so he offered to fix it in a couple minutes free of charge. What could I say? No thanks, cavities are my style. YES FIX IT NOW. So the dental hygienist lead me to the dreaded cavity filling room. I was anticipating the smell of burning teeth and pain beyond compare. What happened was some sort of quick fix air blow-y suction things and no pain or horrid smell to be found. I was pleased with this solution. The point of telling you all this is nothing more than to express just how much I love cleaning my teeth and having others clean them. Also, to inform you all of how my Monday afternoon dentist appointment went. Thanks for caring!