Howdy Troglodytes, welcome to the thirty-third totem of HACK. If you’ve made it this far, remember that March is just Marc with an ‘h.’
“A fool who persists in his folly will become wise. So what they do is they speed up the folly.” –Alan Watts
I gotta tell ya folks, for me, the end of February kind of sucked. Although I am a Pisces and this is zodiacal time period, things usually around this time of year. But then I found out that in sidereal astrology I’d actually be an Aquarius. Man, fuck the zodiac. The map is not the territory. The patterns between the stars are not the stars themselves. Do you think a star trillions of miles away really gives a shit about how it’s cosmic existence affects the karma of a single species on a one boondock planet? Well, according to quantum non-locality, that could very well be the case.
But if that is the case, then a vibrator being used 2 1/2 hours away is affecting my circadian rhythms and a random rabid racoon is having unintelligible mental flashes of a Quantum Leap marathon that I’m currently in the middle of. Everything is everything. But this week’s HACK is really about nothing.
Right now I have nothing much to say about anything and that is a good thing.
Presidential elections never really end. Even when the person gets elected, they’re already running for the next race which has already begun.
My car died last week. It’s like a giant karmic weight has been lifted. Let’s look at the stats:
Car #1 – a lemon, died in less than 4 months
Car #2 – 1988 Buick Regal, died on Taconic Parkway
Car #3 – 2001 Honda Civic, totaled by my parents’ cleaning lady
Car #4 – 1996 Saturn, radiator blew in Jersey City, entire car surrounded by smoke going down JFK, I turned off and parked in front of a church.
Car #5 – I have until March 19 to find a new car.
If one thing’s for certain, it’s that nothing seems certain.
On Saturday I was walking down JFK in Jersey City and a bunch of people were standing on corners and in shop doorways waiting for a parade to start. I never saw the parade during my entire walk to the PATH station. Just a bunch of people staring at an empty street, waiting for something to happen. Well, there were cop cars riding all over the place. It felt like the buildup to a Two Minute Hate.
My parents got me a Kindle Fire for my birthday and it is an evil, evil device. I can’t stop playing with it. It’s just too much information. All of this techno-saturation in the past decade has made me more ADD and probably ADHD. It may not even be a chemical thing, just a byproduct of info-culture interaction. Instant. I can’t even sit through a single TV episode let alone a whole movie without getting fidgety. Maybe it’s just time to do yoga again.
On another note, enough with all these corporate confines around information: this device only does these things, that device is now obsolete and the new one costs too much, you must purchase our audio/visual content, you must pay for this plan, pay for this upgrade, pay for that storage, sorry this feature not included. Enough! Just give me NODES of varying sizes that connect through touch or wireless so I can carry the device size I need and access all information from a central server, anywhere. Well, we’re getting there.
Is that an aperture in the space time continuum, or are you just happy to see me?
You say I’m ridiculous but you are real dickless
Fickle, your gesture with its texture so pricklish
Why does it all seem so suspicious?
You talking your hate man that shit is vicious
What did I do to earn your derision?
Or do you just lack the capacity to grasp this vision?
I’m talking HEAVEN, son
But your head’s still stuck in the clouds
You’re alone on a stage
Caged by a faceless crowd
They wait for you to fall
All because you’re so proud
And when you go down
The applause is loud
Teach a fish to man and it evolves for a lifetime.
Shit. This is due tomorrow? Damn you self-imposed meaningless deadlines! Shit. Twenty weeks left till we hit the one year point. Can a fella get some cohesive content?
So the other benefit of house sitting is that it’s 1/2 mile from work. And since the car died (see above) I can ride my bike to and from work in less than ten minutes. It’s fucking awesome. A much better free-roaming experience than driving.
Believe it or not, as phoned in as these HACKS have been the past couple of weeks, good and bad things of great intensity are happening, I just have enough good sense not to tell you about it on the Internet.
Check this: Down the street from where I work is a corner market/deli called Fine Fare. Fine Fare is the name of a chain of supermarkets in England. In the 1973 album ‘Selling England By The Pound,” then Genesis frontman Peter Gabriel sang a few lines on the 8th and last track of the album, ‘Aisle of Plenty,’ a haunting one-minute reference to the corporate takeover of Britannia. He sings:
I don’t belong here!” said old tessa out loud
Easy love, there’s the safe way home
-thankful for her fine fair discount, tess co-operates
So it’s funny because every day I get to buy my lunch and cigarettes from inside a Genesis reference. Or course, the store’s owners have no idea and I’m certainly not going to explain it to them. You can’t save everybody!
“I dream about you nightly. It sucks.”
Also next to where I work is a church. It’s a big, beautiful, old church. I haven’t been in it at all yet. I don’t know why. I had this whole plan of going in there during my lunch breaks during the winter. But then winter never actually happened. I also suspect I haven’t gone in there because I’m not ready, or like, I’m trying to see how much I can get through before I go in there and pray to God to help me deal with it all. Now, believe me, I could pray anywhere, temple or desert. But I was raised Catholic so churches create cherished associations of spirituality for me. Particularly when I compare/contrast the kid who went to church and was an altar boy to the broken yet super-glued-back-together-hero you see before you in tiny vibrations of waves rippling particles into atoms combined into molecular electrical pixels forming input/output language into letters and words your brain interprets as LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME!
A penny saved is worthless because money isn’t real.
And that’s about where I left off last night. Now it’s 24 hours later and I had to ride the bike to and from school tonight to get the power cord I left at the staff meeting this afternoon all so I could finish this HACK before Wednesday is over. Oh, by the way, FUCK DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME. Time is relative enough and it certainly moves faster than enough you fuckers. My argument against daylight savings is because it fucks with circadian rhythms. You know what, let’s go one further and just say FUCK TIME.
Anyway, it’s time I ended this personal purgatory. I’ll see you on another day in paradise.