Howdy Recipients, welcome to the thirty-second communique of HACK. If you’ve made it this far, take comfort in knowing that this is not your life.
This week we’ve got real talk. I’ve chopped up some chats, swiped snippets of salubrious speech, and intertwined some serious oral intercourse with quixotic moments of reflective quietude. In other words, I hacked off pieces of recent convos and rehashed them, some in context and some far out. (I don’t even know what that means.) I rewrote everything after that comma at least six times before moving onto this point. I’d like to thank all the people who knowingly or unknowingly have provided half of this week’s material, though their true identities will remain anonymous.
And as far as I know, none of them are part of Anonymous. Unless my brain has already been psychologically hacked and they can now flood me with thousands of requests to connect to the itsthecrew.com server, causing a total metaphysical breakdown.
A black hole in the center of a white blog.
event horizon gravities
sucking through black cavities
yet here we are (forever?)
stuck in singularities
Feudal Elf: I know people probably get tired of my food pics! But then that is the evolution of this crazy open reality show on fb. Too many opinions and judgements damn it !! And I will be a judge and say I hate it when people use fb as a business to sell stupid shitty candles!!
Peerless Wargod: Jeez, what sicko would sell candles that smell like shit?
Towel Boy: the new rule should be a single degree from everything in the known universe to Kevin Bacon
Not Bob: 1. quantum inseparability.
“Sleep is like a woman–it rejects me.”
February 19, 3:26 PM
Dokuhime: Uh. I always have horrible dreams about you.
February 20, 12:27 AM
Professor: “Dreams pass in time.” –Obi-Wan Kenobi
February 27, 2:03 AM
Dokuhime: “I’ll take the dream I had last night And put it in my freezer, So someday long and far away… I’ll take it and thaw it out… and realize it was nothing more than I dream.”
February 27, 2:17 AM
Dokuhime: I can’t sleep
And dreams are just hopeless
Agenda: Ideabox Takeover
Splornk: @Gluurg…. Resurrecting is random. First time I kept trying (saved the coins and all that) and he never did it. The next two I never had the coin when I was looking. The last one he just eventually did it on his own…
Gluurg: we should still agree to vote on something and get it accepted into the game
NegaSyrus2d: I’m good with group voting
Gluurg: well, i’ve got ‘Exercise the demons’ as a quest being voted on. we could use that to experiment…so everyone go vote for it and see if we can wield some influence
NegaSyrus: I voted up..I don’t see why it has so many down votes though, it’s pretty good, imo.
Gluurg: all my shit has been voted down except one that made it in (Quest: Complete a fool’s errand) granted, they’re not all gems!
Kathundera: I voted up!
2 days later…
Gluurg: it’s working folks! if you haven’t voted you have 12 hours left…if this goes through we’ll try someone else’s idea…
One Der: it seems to be in the enhancement room… i can’t vote!
Splornk: I voted yesterday Oh, and said yes…LOL
Gluurg: today the ideabox, tomorrow the world
Deep Conversations Too (The Too Tired To Edit Mix)
me: i’m up now if you’re free for a bit
damnedshadow88: oh jesus. i think my brain died but if you start a convo im sure ill wake up a bit
9:58 PM me: i’ve got nothin
i’m much better at answering questions
then i can’t shut up
damnedshadow88: haha, same here
Thats how me and my most recent gf broke up
9:59 PM me: oh, really?
she couldn’t handle the genius, huh?
damnedshadow88: dude, she was really intelligent in the remembering department.
she remembered EVERYTHING EVER
but she couldn’t grasp “out of the box” concepts
10:00 PM me: gotchya
damnedshadow88: and all i could get out of her was “idk”
couldn’t have a deep convo. and things just .. died
me: yeah i mean, i have no interest if you can’t keep up a convo
get bored very easily
no matter how hot they are
10:01 PM damnedshadow88: here here
10:02 PM k
10:03 PM k so
did you read anymore of the book?
damnedshadow88: what the fuck were we talking about
yea. im about 100 pgs in
10:04 PM me: anything else you liked, didn’t like, didn’t understand?
10:05 PM me: haha
yeah i tried to put in as many possible scenarios as i could haha
damnedshadow88: there was so much stuff. i have to skim back and actually remember everything i liked
10:06 PM i know the time warriors i think it was called
that was interesting
and the one about the imaginary alien that only says “sheesh”
10:07 PM How did you manage to think of a world wide BAD TRIP?
10:09 PM who is Aaron?
he’s an ex friend of ours
10:10 PM i dunno, a couple friends pissed him off or something and he broke off all contact with us
about 11 years ago
it was weird
he was a core member before that
10:11 PM damnedshadow88: whhhhhhhat
10:12 PM what would make him do that?
what did friends say?
your friends say*
10:13 PM me: i really don’t know what the fuck it was
we were all surprised
he just moved out to indiana but now he’s back in the area and working for his aunt and uncle’s tv station
10:15 PM damnedshadow88: ever try to make contact?
once a year at our friend russ’ birthday party
10:16 PM we get russ to call him (he still has aaron’s cell and it still has his voice on the answering machine) and we each leave a short message for him
damnedshadow88: is it sarcastic?
me: he never answers or returns the call
well for me it wasn’t
10:17 PM i think the last thing is said was something like, “dude, to this day i still don’t know why you had any beef with me personally, but i love you and hope you’re well and…i hope you die well…”
at which point everyone laughed out loud
10:22 PM damnedshadow88: wow, im suprised hes still living lol
if he is
thats pretty low
10:23 PM me: yeah
but if he died i trust the universe to let us know about it
damnedshadow88: you even implanted his death in the message..
me: that’s true i did
he is one of my recurring dream characters, quite vivid
shows up now and again
10:24 PM damnedshadow88: lol.
what is his character like?
what does he do?
10:25 PM me: he’s short pudgy
he was a good guy
10:26 PM some of the things in my piece are real
when he said, “Why can’t people realize that things just ARE.”
i always remembered that
10:28 PM damnedshadow88: oh ok.
cuz things really just ARE
10:30 PM me: i’ve spent my entire life contemplating the insights
for me it was a bit traumatic
painful at first
but after having years to process the experience
i don’t regret it
because i wouldn’t be as aware as i am today
which isn’t much but it’s more than most
10:31 PM think of it in terms of expanding awareness
consciousness literally expands
10:33 PM damnedshadow88: meaning…
me: the categories your mind imposes on the world dissolve
you understand the interconnectedness of everything
the illusory nature of all reality
that you are not your physical body
10:34 PM and that time and space are illusions created by the mind
damnedshadow88: how do you experience that?
me: you understand that telepathy is real
you literally experience it
there’s no other way tot put it
it’s like taking a magnifying glass to the brain
it magnifies your thoughts and emotions
sending them off into unprecedented places
damnedshadow88: compare it to something else
me: if you are not in the right frame of mind
10:35 PM your train of thought can derail into negativity and that can be bad
there’s no point in comparing
it is completely and totally different
something like that
10:37 PM damnedshadow88: wow
yea, im naturally pessimistic
im working on it. but i wouldn’t trust myself
10:38 PM me: good idea…it’s funny though how it’s the best advice for normal consciousness as well…
you just have to remember two important things
set is the mood, the company you keep, how you’re feeling…the company is very important, you should have a sitter, someone or some entity with experience to guide you ALWAYS
10:39 PM although i prefer doing it alone because people just make me more paranoid
setting is the enviornment which is very important
you should be comfortable in safe surroundings
and this is key
you will understand that things just are because you realize that there is only one moment
10:40 PM damnedshadow88: oh yea. my god. most of the time i’ve done it is with people i dont really know and in places im not familiar with
me: you will be confronted with the immediacy of the moment
yeah well that’s the problem
10:44 PM damnedshadow88: but i always end up looking at the social factors and just observe everyone doing their thing
me: that’s the best part
damnedshadow88: i learned a lot about people
me: that’s how you learn the most
i learned most of all
10:45 PM that most people are asleep
damnedshadow88: however. it was bad because i was paranoid towards the end
me: but cognitively
paranoia always got me in the end
much better at redirecting it now though
damnedshadow88: yea. same here
10:46 PM damnedshadow88: when im alone. im fine. even with my close friend. its all good. but once someone i deem “cooler” than me is around, its a power struggle
me: yeah and that is all a creation in your mind
that’s your own fears and insecurities projected onto that person
i learned something or rather realized something only last week
almost all of my pre-judgments about people are incorrect
10:47 PM it is only when i push the judgment down and keep an open mind do i soon learn that the person is a decent human being…um, most of the time
remember at all times that everything is created by you
10:48 PM you literally have to tell yourself to think differently
damnedshadow88: YES! you choose to see the good or the bad in the person
me: most people ride their thoughts like they’re passengers on a train
we have to be the conductors
damnedshadow88: i know this girl that is RIDICULOUSLY optimistic
idk how she does it
me: i don’t trust anyone that is that happy
10:49 PM damnedshadow88: i want to know what the world looks like through her eyes
me: probably horrible
i’m being cynical
damnedshadow88: you are
me: my guess is she tells herself a lot of lies
damnedshadow88: its great for her
me: but then
that’s all we can do
damnedshadow88: oh course!
me: so maybe she’s figured it all out
damnedshadow88: lies are a good thing lol
me: there is this thing called the intelligence trap
(i’m calling it that)
10:50 PM damnedshadow88: alright
me: which means that the more you think about your thoughts the more prone you are to depression, feelings of isolation, etc
because it’s harder and harder to find people on that level
damnedshadow88: experienced that
me: and overthinking things is no good
it takes you out of the reactive now
damnedshadow88: oh i def know that
10:51 PM im having trouble predicting how much time went by these days
seriously, monday feels like 2 wks ago
me: because time is subjective illusion
it’s a construct we create to prevent everything from happening at once
it’s like what alan watts said
the point of a musical composition is not the final note
it’s everything that leads up to that one note
10:52 PM if it was about the last note, we’d go to see concerts where the band performs one giant crash and the curtains fall
which is ridiculous
so we need time so we can play our human games
pretending to not be where we already are
so that we can enjoy the feel of getting there
damnedshadow88: do you think that is why we made these bodies?
10:53 PM because the physical body can slow time perception down
10:54 PM cuz if we were just out entities. then all events would just be one big crash of instruments
to the inanimate object, time moves by fast.
me: that is an interesting idea
i read once that in our dimension there is a time delay
10:55 PM between the moment when we have a thought and when it manifests in reality
damnedshadow88: like in the movie Merlin.. one of those movies. The stone that is holding the sword speaks and says something like “it seems but just a moment ago you were charging me with this task to hold the sword” but like a long time in the movie had passed.
me: people are unhappy because their dreams aren’t manifesting instantly before their eyes
that dimension requires a level of emotional discipline before you can play that game
10:56 PM damnedshadow88: yea totally. its human reaction time
me: think about it
the best people, in all fields, it’s most glaring in sports
damnedshadow88: we think. then shit has to happen. and then it happens
me: are the ones who can completely lose themselves in the moment
10:57 PM and allow themselves to be absorbed into everything going on around them
so that their consciousness embodies not just their physical form
damnedshadow88: but their environment
me: but the awareness of the universe, in its purest form that is
10:58 PM damnedshadow88: YES
but usually going deeper into your consciousness is stressful.. for me at least
we are in a society that is simply not educated at all about how to go about these things
10:59 PM but
the universe finds a way to enlighten those who seek
at least that’s what i keep telling myself
and the universe
which is me
damnedshadow88: but when musicians play an instrument or players play their sport, they almost effortlessly bond with the environment, communicating with it so quickly….
11:00 PM time and space are also like a canvas
music is really about timing
damnedshadow88: i know that feeling
me: otherwise the notes are meaningless
damnedshadow88: when i play guitar. some days im just out of sync with everything.
me: and you need the space to make the sounds
damnedshadow88: but other days im in the groove
11:01 PM me: what if you are always in the groove
and just don’t realize it?
now i’m just being pedantic
damnedshadow88: and i contrast the difference and i notice that it is the timing. i slow down my playing and take time to deliberate. but the music sounds so much less choppy and i feel harmonious with everything
11:02 PM me: that’s what meditation and yoga and all that are about
breathing to slow you down
and bring you to that still, receptive state
because creation is about receiving BEFORE giving
damnedshadow88: everyone is always “in the groove” but not consciously
damnedshadow88: if it exists, it is “in the groove”
11:03 PM me: exactly
damnedshadow88: creation is about reviving…
me: yes creation is reviving
otherwise i don’t see why anyone would do it
11:04 PM damnedshadow88: oh oops. i thought it said receiving
because you are receiving information from the universe
damnedshadow88: oh it did taht that
11:05 PM me: you can’t put out until you get in the groove
well you can. it’ll just me slower lol
me: actually my grooviest time is dreamtime
which i must get to
11:06 PM i’m just debating shower now or at 5:15 this morning
damnedshadow88: tis always the question
me: so, until next time, keep your questions in mind and ask away
that’s why they call me The Oracle
damnedshadow88: I thought you were Towel Boy?
11:07 PM me: but they also call me a Damned Fool
i am also towel boy
me: and poemfish
and the peerless wargod of the immortals
damnedshadow88: you are a man of many names
me: and the soul dirty bastard
and Armcus M’Asdobre
damnedshadow88: is that your spanish counterpart?
11:08 PM me: hahaha
i was thinking more ancient latin
damnedshadow88: Armcus works for that
me: he’s the parts of myself not yet fully integrated into the holon that will become Towel Boy
damnedshadow88: but the “bre” at the end makes it sound spaniard-like
me: true…he must be a bastard child, then
damnedshadow88: New character?
me: an old one, resurrected
just like new
damnedshadow88: bout time? Jesus did it in 3 days!
11:21 PM me: peace out yo
damnedshadow88: peace in
so this is the e-mail mentioned in the text I sent in response to your call because i am currently not in a fit state to speak to anyone. i think you are awesome. i know i never followed up on your offer. of course i’m in limbo this weekend. not that you need to know or care, but i’ve had what you would call a HELL OF A WEEK so i am on this adrenalin rush of a month’s worth of stress and exhaustion and i’ve basically cracked a bit the last few hours. of course, a normal sane human being would go out a normal person would not be in this state. yet here i am on the verge of collapsing into a dreamless sleep. now, i could crack a little more and drive back up tomorrow and show up. in some separate eigenstate that reality will happen. i really can’t say at this point whether my current vector will collapse into that reality but if the theory is correct then anything’s still possible, if not likely, to occur. unless i die before the next time i see you then hopefully there will be other opportunities although i am conscious of the fact that opportunities seem to vastly outweigh my abilities. i stole that last from a bio-numerology app i looked at today. at any rate, let me mangle this line: i don’t really know you half as well as i should like and i spend time with less than half of you half as well as i deserve. i’ll let you get back to marital bliss. one love.
My heart is an ultimatum. I’ve always believed that circumstances didn’t matter if you truly love someone.
Towel Boy: Get me Tropicana.
Michael: Do you want it in a box?
Towel Boy: Not if it’s not from concentrate…I mean, not if it’s from concentrate.
Michael: Why don’t you concentrate on this, bitch?
Towel Boy: Why don’t you concentrate on DEEZ NUTS?.