Posts in category Cosmology
I Don’t Belong Here: Intelligent Design Theory Is Bunk
There’s a lot of reasons why I don’t believe in Intelligent Design Theory. They mostly boil down to, THEN WHY IS EVERYTHING SO FUCKING DUMB? READ MORE »
I Don’t Belong Here: Hate
I hate it all. READ MORE »
I Don’t Belong Here: Minor Heresies For The Modern Age
Each week in I Don’t Belong Here, I have attempted to tackle some major world issue, or some pressing human concern, or just rape jokes. This week I would like to take a break from that and address some smaller, yet equally crucial, issues that I feel are important to discuss. READ MORE »
I Don’t Belong Here: Hip-Hip-Hypocrisy!
Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites!
(Matthew 23:27)
In the beginning, there was no dissembling. There was no separation between word and deed. How could there be? In the BEGINNING beginning, there was no word at all! Sorry, John of Patmos. And coming from a pre-verbal animal background, in the beginning we hadn’t yet learned to lie. To say one thing and do another. Then we figured it out, and this knowledge was the birth of hypocrisy. Now, a lot of people will tell you that hypocrisy is bad. Bad, bad, bad. So it should go without saying that if there is something so reviled and scorned by so many people, then you can be sure I am about to tell you why it is good and necessary. READ MORE »
I Don’t Belong Here: Justify My Hate
“When I started reading the articles I knew exactly what I was going to get. Doug was going to write about sports. Marc was going to be all philosophical and use a lot of big words I have to look up. And you were going to justify your hatred.”
- Attila Szendrodi
In today’s touchy-feely atmosphere, hate is considered awful. Truly, truly awful. But this is because “hate” has such a narrow and negative connotation. Basically when you think of hate, you think of some redneck, neo-Nazi, inbred hillbilly who is expressing his distaste for Negroes and homosexuals. READ MORE »
I Don’t Belong Here: We Must Destroy The Earth
“The first polluters, remember, were anaerobic single-celled organisms who forever destroyed their own eco-system and permanently altered the Earth with their main waste product, an extremely toxic and reactive chemical. What was it called?
“Oxygen.”
READ MORE »
Letters From God: Dreams
I dreamt of a Dr. Seuss bowling alley and hysterical giggles.
I dreamt that Mahopac was a dumpster land and I drove through it thinking of how I had forgotten my coupon. READ MORE »
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